Lately I've been thinking often about this concept, this amorphous idea, of moving towards one's truest center a little more ever day.
I think anyone who is actively engaged in soul work of any kind knows this concept on some level: That we strive to find the most honest part of our soul, the truest level of our core, the place where all the fluff and grit and busyness of life has been striped away and nothing is left but the shining light of our individuality. This is neither easy nor quick, but it is a thing like whittling away a bit of the world's idea of who you are and what you are about. It's like removing just one sliver of that a day so that when you wake in the morning, a little more of your brilliant soul is shinning bright.
I find this to be worthy goal in art making. To sit down in the studio and say to myself, "what is so important to me that I can not bear to go another day without creating it?" This does not need to equate to heart-wrenching or gut-spilling (although sometimes it does) - not at all! - in fact it can be "pretty" or "plain" or even "silly," it just needs to feel Important to you in your heart of hearts. If it does, then it must be explored. If it ignites a flame of hope or passion or joy, then it deserves your attention. And if we give it its due investigation, then in that, I believe we honor ourselves and find a deeper honesty than what had existed before.
Of course I never expect to fully arrive at my own True Center. That would be like saying "I've gained quite enough knowledge for one life" and even typing those words felt ridiculous.
I had a breakthrough this week. A subtle, quiet breakthrough, the kind where one has to sit very still and turn off all music and wait for the idea to sidle up and nuzzle your ear. It was really just a whisper, a faint outline, but the flame of my heart burst open none the less.
HERE is where you place your next step on the path. This idea, this thing is just one inch closer to the truest center of art that resides in you, that gilded glowing flow of inspiration that is yours and yours alone. It is that thing wherein you can say "yes, yes that is exactly what I want to say."
I'm closer today than I was yesterday.
If I am I very lucky woman, I'll be able to say that every week of my life.
I have so much faith that you understand this. This remarkable community, my soul sisters, my tribe members WHO NEVER CEASE TO AMAZE ME, I have no doubt that you have had your own breakthroughs to YOU. And if you're comfortable, I'd really love to hear about them.
In the meanwhile, I'm off to nom an artichoke and watch some Star Trek.
~ Umber ~